7 August 2025

Why knowing your personal values is crucial for leading with purpose

Kate Hill

As a leader, every conversation, decision and dilemma you face is filtered through something deeply personal: your values. Yet many leaders rush past this work, assuming it's just about picking five words from a list and calling it done.

But values aren't a tick-box exercise. They're the foundation of how you lead - and knowing them can change everything.

Why values matter in leadership

Your personal values act like an invisible compass. When you’re clear on them, you lead more confidently and make better decisions. When you’re not, you can feel stuck, scattered, or unsure why something just feels off.

When your values are clear:

You make decisions more easily
You set better boundaries
You feel more confident and less conflicted
You spot misalignment early

You lead in a way that actually feels like you

When your values are unclear:

You overthink
You overcommit
You avoid decisions
You tolerate poor behaviour
You feel ‘off’ and can’t explain why

This work isn’t fluffy. It’s foundational.

What are personal values?

Values are your deeply held beliefs. They might be:

Ways of being: honesty, courage, kindness
Priorities: stability, autonomy, learning
Aspirational qualities: growth, innovation, fairness

Often, your values are shaped by your early life, role models, career highs and lows, and moments that have made you proud - or furious. They’re unique to you, and they matter more than you realise.

What alignment feels like

Think back to a time when you felt proud, energised or fulfilled. Maybe you:

Delivered a project that made a difference
Stood up for someone when it counted
Said no to something that didn’t sit right
Led in a way that felt fair and focused

That feeling of ease or satisfaction? That’s your values being honoured.

What misalignment feels like

Now think about a time when you felt off, frustrated or demotivated - even when everything looked fine on the surface. That’s often a values mismatch.

For example:

You value collaboration but work in a highly competitive environment
You value integrity but are asked to bend the truth
You value space but keep saying yes to more

It doesn’t always mean something’s wrong. But it does mean something’s not right for you.

How to identify your values

You don’t need a quiz or survey. Start with reflection:

When were you at your best?
What were you doing, and what felt important in that moment?
What would you protect at all costs?
What values are non-negotiable for you?
What makes you angry?
What do other people do that really bothers you — and what value might they be trampling on?
Ask for feedback
Message trusted friends or colleagues and ask them to describe you in a few words. What themes stand out?

Narrow it down

After reflection, you’ll likely have a long list. Start narrowing:

Highlight what feels most true
Group words and choose the stronger one
Aim for 3 to 5 core values that feel essential

These are the ones that guide your behaviour, shape your decisions and help you feel most like yourself.

I offer more personal guidance on finding your values in both my one-to-one and group coaching programmes: discover more here.

When your behaviour doesn’t match your values

Sometimes, there’s a disconnect between what you say you value and what you’re doing. That’s not about guilt. It’s about awareness.

For example:

You value honesty but avoid difficult conversations
You value family but regularly work into the evening
You value fairness but stay silent when someone is interrupted

Ask yourself:

What’s getting in the way?
What would living this value look like this week?
What’s one small way I can realign?

When others go against your values

It’s not always about you. Sometimes others act in ways that don’t sit right — because they clash with your values.

For example:

You value kindness, and a colleague regularly belittles others
You value transparency, but decisions are made behind closed doors
You value calm, but your manager thrives on chaos

Ask yourself:

Can I tolerate this?
Can I influence it?
If not, is it time to move on?

Your values will change - and that’s a good thing

You’re not the same person you were five years ago. Life changes us - and so should our values.

It’s worth regularly checking in:

What matters now?
What’s fallen away?
What needs protecting?

A real example

One founder came to coaching feeling flat, despite their business thriving. Through reflection, they realised creativity - a core value - had been missing from their role. A few small changes reintroduced that value, and their fulfilment returned.

That’s what this work does. It brings your values back into focus - and with them, your energy and effectiveness.